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Ex-bg in fear of losing her farang


think_too_mut

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Well, I had to cancel my trip to LOS the other day and my gf there is pissed off big time. The trouble is that the event that had ocurred may prevent me from going there any time soon.

 

 

 

She took it as "you no love me any more". On the webcam yesterday she did not pull a single smile over 3 hours.

 

 

 

I must have sounded unconvincing so 2 hours after the session she tried to contact her former customer who is coming in 2 months. (she does not know I know that).

 

Obviously, she is trying to fortify herself for possible loss of income.

 

 

 

I told her she won't be left out in cold and as long as she is doing well in school she will have my full support. I really mean it.

 

 

 

It became even worse when I said - well, if I can't be with you, I'll help you find somebody, maintain you in the environment where you can meet good people, even introduce you to some nice blokes of your age.

 

 

 

It got ripped apart as "I am not good for you any more".

 

 

 

The money here is not her issue I think - she wants someone to be with (and to have money as a secondary priority).

 

 

 

Phieww....should I let her try her luck with that other guy? The man is a nice gentleman from what I know about him. If he gives her more of security she may well be happier with him.

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Tell her you are gay. No recriminations.

 

 

 

LOL. Yes, that ploy always works...if you can skip town.

 

 

 

It's difficult to interpret posts like the original one, because they always leave out important details. People will tell you 99% of the story, but the last 1% changes everything.

 

 

 

Need to sit at a bar and talk to the guy, look him in the eye, see the girl, look her in the eye. No one, however eloquent, can tell the whole story on a message board.

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It seems to me you have been having some communication problems and while that was on she did a serious mistake.

 

 

 

Be honest to her, let her know she has been caught red handed. But to trust her again? If she has done it once, she will do it twice if the opportunity arises. Might be best to let her try her luck with the other fellow.

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I don't think she has done anything wrong. She may as well fumes that TTM wronged her by not coming. It's a fast scene, when one is not up to the plate. Life goes on for him and her, but if he can monitor her net mail or sessions, he did not tell us she contacted the other guy before. Time to wish her good luck with anybody she wishes, IMO. The thread shows these affairs are hard to conduct from long distance (hard enough, close by!)

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>communication problems and while that was on she did a serious mistake.

 

 

 

>let her know she has been caught red handed. But to trust her again? If she has done it once, she will do it twice if the opportunity arises.

 

 

 

Early this year the guy had received her message where she announced she was out of the game and had a husband.

 

 

 

He wished her all the best.

 

 

 

A week ago, his new mail arrived and he asked her to come out for a drink while in town, nothing else.

 

 

 

She held on to it until yesterday where she responded "ok for a drink, have lots to tell you about my life". No "love you", "miss you" or similar. Started with "Hi", ended with "Regards, xxx".

 

 

 

How do I know that? There is a piece of software running on the PC. Legally, you can run it only on a PC you own. I own that one and it is with her to help her with her studies.

 

 

 

 

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It seems it could be innocent enough. Whatever questions you are asking here should be bettered answered by yourself. It seems you have enough background info to make the right descisions.

 

 

 

The sulking mood which you are describing? I have seen that attitude all too much. It can be a pain in the ass, but I suppose we have to live with that.

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>She may as well fumes that TTM wronged her by not coming.

 

 

 

I know they can stage crying at will but this was giing on for hours and days. The night before she told me she was taking 2 sleeping pills, did not want to turn up in school and everybody could see her "red ball eyes" as the day before.

 

 

 

Knowing how I felt about not going, good chance she's telling me the truth here.

 

 

 

> he did not tell us she contacted the other guy before.

 

 

 

When she got out the scene, upon my first visit to her "in her new life", she showed me 4 messages she had sent to her contacts. They were all the same "thank you for being nice to me, I have husband now, bye". Totally unsolicited.

 

 

 

Great guys all of them, good wishes from all came back. Over last 6-7 months, 2 or 3 messages from "unknown" mailers got ignored and deleted.

 

 

 

>The thread shows these affairs are hard to conduct from long distance ...

 

 

 

I thought I had it all watertight and coming back every 10-12 weeks seemed to be bearable. And the limit was set (April next year) when it was to become a live together relationship.

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Excuse me.

 

 

 

'If I can't be with you, I'll help you find somebody'.

 

 

 

I'm sure this was meant well, but it strikes me that this could come over as quite hurtful.

 

 

 

And it makes me wonder how much you really love her if you can consider the idea of passing her on to someone else.

 

 

 

If I think that as a stranger, maybe she, knowing you better might also worry that you don't truly love her, and that might indeed give her cause to worry about your commitment and the amount of security you are offering.

 

 

 

Maybe it isn't the simple fact that you can't make it over to visit her - it is a deeper sense that you aren't ultimately going to commit to her.

 

 

 

A lot of times I sit in bars talking to men who are complaining that Thai girls never trust them. But they say this while they are in a go-go bar eying up the girls, and often with the intent of going home with one.

 

 

 

So often the girls who express worry or concern about their farang boyfriends turn out to be entirely justified in their concern.

 

 

 

Of course, I don't know your situation, and maybe none of this applies to you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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