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I'm in Micronesia at the moment. The following was on a local wall. Too funny and very real. Chuuk women, it's true!

 

Dating Rituals in Micronesia by rustyrusty

6 years ago edited August 2011 in General

WHITE WOMEN

 

First date: You buy her dinner at Godfathers Bar and get to kiss her goodnight.

 

Second date: You get to grope all over and make out.

 

Third date: You get to have sex, but only in the missionary position.

 

 

 

CHAMORRO WOMEN

 

First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.

 

Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.

 

Third Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.

 

20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.

 

 

 

CAROLINIAN WOMEN

 

First Date: You meet at Islanders then go to 13 Fishermen then have sex.

 

Second Date: You meet her parents.

 

Third Date: She wants to marry you.

 

5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together and hate the thought of having sex.

 

6th Anniversary: You find yourself a girlfriend.

 

 

 

PALAUAN WOMEN

 

First date: Meet at USSP Bar then have sex.

 

Second date: Meet her parents.

 

Third date: Set the date of the wedding.

 

Fourth date: Wedding night.

 

 

 

POHNPEIAN WOMEN

 

First Date: You meet at USSP Bar then get dynamite sex.

 

Second Date: You get more great sex.

 

Third Date: You tell her you'll marry her and never get laid again.

 

 

 

FILIPINA WOMEN

 

First date: You buy her dinner and drinks at the Tribe, but nothing happens.

 

Second date: You buy her dinner and drinks at Shirleys Coffee Shop, but nothing happens again.

 

Third date: You don't even get to the third date and you already realized nothing is going to happen.

 

 

 

JAPANESE WOMEN

 

First date: You meet at Jonny's Bar.

 

Second date: You take her to the Grotto.

 

Third date: You take her to Managaha Island.

 

Fourth date: You take her to Jonny's again, get drunk then have sex.

 

Fifth date: You have sex then take her to the airport.

 

 

 

CHUUKESE WOMEN

 

First Date: You meet at her cousins house and have sex at your cousins house.

 

Second Date: She's pregnant.

 

Third Date: She moves in. One week later, her mother, father, her two sisters, her brother, all of their kids, her grandma, her two cousins, her sister's boyfriend and his three kids move in ... and you live on rice and chicken and/or turkey tail for the rest of your life in your home that used to be nice, but now looks like a barracks for tagalus.

 

 

 

THE POINT????

 

DON'T YOU JUST LOVE CHAMORRO WOMEN?!

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