Bringing The Bible To Bangkok, The Mormons Are Here To Stay

[Flashermac]

Nearly 50 years after Mormons opened small churches in Thailand, converting Buddhists, animists and other Thais, they have announced plans to construct their first big temple here, enabling their families to be “sealed†together for eternity, posthumous weddings for dead ancestors and other “highest sacramentsâ€.

 

...

 

 

http://www.bangkokpo...re-here-to-stay

 

 

Oddly enough, I've never seen a Mormon missionary carrying a Bible. It's always Joe Smith's book.

 

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06jF1EG8o-Q

[bust]

Two Americans rang my neighbours doorbell earlier today, both clutching the book of Mormon. They told him that they were from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and they wanted to come inside his home to pray with him.

 

He reckoned they were nice enough guys - but they were really shit at it. They didn't even know which direction Mecca was in.

[My Penis is hungry]

HEHEHEH

[YimSiam]

For all I know they're carrying Penthouse Letters Collected Editions - once I see the name tags, I'm outta there... Lots of Mormons in my extended family, and that is one particular brand of nonsense I don't need to indulge...

[The_Munchmaster]

There was an old Aussie farmer digging post holes in his paddock near the main road, when a black car pulled up with steam billowing from under its bonnet.

 

Two men, both attired in black suits, white shirts and black ties, got out of the car and approached the old farmer. "Excuse me sir, can you please help us as our car seams to have become incapacitated".

 

"Yer better let me have a look then", replied the farmer and after looking under the bonnet, he filled the radiator with water from the sheep trough and said, "Ya have hole in ya radiator, if ya leave ya radiator cap off it will get ya to the next town, Kickaginalong. When ya get there go and see old Fred at the Caltex garageâ€.

 

"Thats a lovely deed you’ve done sir, you’re a good samaritian in a harsh land", said one of the men. "We would like to thank you by giving you a book in appreciationâ€, said the other.

 

"Nope, not fur meâ€, said the farmer, “I havent got time fur readen’, I’m up with the sparras and into bed with the chooks".

 

"Perhaps if we read you a passage from the book you might like to take it", said the one of the men.

 

"Well go on then, be quick, I gotta get home fur me tea", said the farmer.

 

"Well, there were two people called Samson and Delilah and they were grinding corn near Jerusalem, when a thousand Philistines came across the top of the hill. Now Samson slew a hundred of them with the jaw bone of an ass and routed the rest!"

 

"Jeez, that’s a beaut of a story, whats the book called?†said the farmer scratching his head.’

 

"Its called the Bibleâ€, said one of the suited gents.

 

"Who wrote itâ€, asked the farmer.

 

"The Lord wrote the Bible", said the gent in a hushed voice.

 

"Never heard of himâ€, said the farmer, “But if ya givin it away I wouldn’t mind havin itâ€.

 

"Here you are, you deserve it, you’re a good man", said the gent and they left.

 

On Friday night the farmer goes into town and walks into the pub with the Bible under his arm. One of his mates pipes up, “G’day Jock what’s that under your wing?â€

 

“It’s a book and I’ll let you read it when I’m finishedâ€, says Jock.

 

"You don’t read ya silly old bugger….what’s it called anywayâ€, mocks his mate.

 

“It’s called the Bibel†replies Jock, “and it’s a hell of a bookâ€. “I’ll tell ya a story out of it then you’ll want it".

 

“Go on then, this I gotta hear", says his mate.

 

Jock puffs his chest out and starts, "Well, there were two people called Simpson and Delicious and they were having a grind in the corn near Jerilderie, when a thousand Philipinos came across the top of the hill. Now Simpson slew a hundred of them with the ass bone of a Jew and rooted the rest!"

[bust]

Jock is a Scottish name

[Flashermac]

For all I know they're carrying Penthouse Letters Collected Editions - once I see the name tags, I'm outta there... Lots of Mormons in my extended family, and that is one particular brand of nonsense I don't need to indulge...

 

 

I've got Mormon cousins, so I was curious and looked into it. What I saw convinced me that it simply was made up nonsense. At least the Bible contains writings over many centuries that combine history with sort of theological interpretations. There are real people (usually) and real places. But Book of Mormon is right off the top of Joseph Smith's head. Even the places he mention can't be shown ever to have existed. Yet I've seen LDS TV commercials that boldly claim that "Archaeology proves the Book of Mormon is true." Oh, no ... it proves just the opposite.

[The_Munchmaster]

Jock is a Scottish name

 

One of my best friends, when I lived in Indonesia, was an Aussie called Jock.

[bust]

One of my best friends, when I lived in Indonesia, was an Aussie called Jock.

 

No doubt with Scottish parents

[Flashermac]

Or a Frenchie who can't spell ...